Healing Through Forgiveness

Tips for Dealing With Your Teen's Misbehavior

28 February 2017 by Kurt Garrett

Being a teenager can be a rough time. There are a lot of bodily changes that can cause teens' hormones to get out of whack, making it difficult for them to make good decisions. Teens feel every emotion much more strongly than adults, leading them to make impulsive, extreme decisions that do not fit the severity of the actual situation. All of this can cause a teen to commit crimes, get violently angry, or other problematic situations. You likely want to limit these as much as possible. When your child is upset, you probably ask him or her what you can do to help and what is wrong. You might get a nonsensical answer. This is a result of thinking errors that teens undergo. Here are some common thinking errors and how you can deal with them.

1. Displacing Blame for Behavior on Something Trivial

The first thing that you need to understand is that your child wants you to care about what he or she is going through and what is upsetting him or her. He or she never wants you to not care. However, you might get the answer "I'm being moody or mad because you won't leave me alone" or "I'm being moody or mad because you keep asking me about school. If you'd stop asking me about school, I'd be happy." You might have gone along with these explanations at first because you were desperate. However, if you get one of these answers, pause for a minute. Your child is telling you that he or she does not want you involved, and because you are involved, he or she is mad. However, he or she might be mad because you are limiting his or her freedom or because you asked about school at a compromising time, such as in front of his or her friends. See if you can identify root issues and, if they are solvable without compromising on the behavior that you expect from your child, try to augment your behavior.

2. Displacing Blame for Behavior on Someone or Something Else

The next thing that you need to watch for is if your teen starts displacing blame for behavior on someone or something else. This can be out of embarrassment, or it can be out of a desire to not get in trouble. Watch out and make sure that you are getting to the root of the problem before you respond. For more information, talk to a professional like those at Youth Programs For Troubled Teens who specializes in helping troubled teens.

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